| The Masters
By Patryk Fournier April 12th, 2004 |
 |
Butler Cabin, Amen Corner, Hogan Bridge, the tall Georgia pines and of course the azaleas kick off a sensory image overload of golf's biggest and most important annual event, The Masters. I'm not an expert on building golf courses by any means but if I were designing or building my own course I don't think you could go wrong with planting some azaleas. For Canadian golfers situated anywhere other than British Columbia the start of The Masters also serves as a welcoming reminder that the harsh doldrums of winter are almost over and weekends will soon be full of amateur players tearing up the local sun-soaked courses. This year's rendition of The Masters was a lackluster event until the final 18 holes played on Easter Sunday. Mike Weir failed to make the third round cut and Tiger Woods was inconsistent and out of the running for much of the week, so there went two major storylines for the weekend. Phil Mickelson entered the tournament (or as Hootie Johnson likes to call it Tuna Mint) as one of the favourites to capture his first Major and surprisingly he did just that despite a valiant effort from Ernie Els who entered the final round three shots back of Mickelson and had a terrific round of 67 which including two eagles. And what was with Mickelson's goofy smile all week? He had this look like he just got lucky in Butler Cabin.
I love the announcing work done for golf events and more specifically The Masters because the announcers are always looking for some sort of angle to create a dramatic storyline or large metaphorical obstacle that a player had to overcome. Don't get me wrong. There are truly inspiring stories like the one last year of Tom Watson reliving success one last time with his long-time caddie Bruce Edwards who has just succumbed to ALS. In light of stories like that I'm just afraid we're all going to hear a trivial occurrence spun into dramatic light one of these days. "And there's the dramatic and inspiring story of Sergio Garcia who this week overcame a broken air conditioner in his hotel room and still came out here and played four solid rounds of golf. Simply remarkable courage displayed from the young Spaniard!" How many newspapers do you think went for the obvious and lame title of "Wilted Rose" after first and second round leader Justin Rose's collapse in the third round? My guess is that the sports editors who choose this lame title are also the same guys that Peter refers to in the movie "Office Space" that greet you after the weekend with "Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays!" Even when Tiger Woods is struggling like he did at this year's rendition of the 68th Masters, you can never really count him out of contention. Woods hasn't looked like his dominant self for a quite a few tournaments and yet you can't bet against him because you know it's only a matter of time. I just love how the announcers ramble through all the scenarios that would put Tiger back within striking distance of the lead; he could be 8 shots back with 6 holes to play and the announcers would still find an argument for why he can win. It kind of reminds me of the Chicago Bears fans skit on SNL:
- Okay, who wins the game if it's Mini-Chicago Bears vs. the New York Giants? I'm sure David Feherty could make a case for Mini Tiger Woods to shoot par. Speaking of Feherty, isn't it weird hearing him announce after playing EA Sports Tiger Woods golf. I keep waiting for him to say things like: "He'll like his next shot from there", "It's in the rough" and "This one's heading for the cattle feed!"
After four days worth of coverage and countless beautiful camera shots of Augusta National I felt like I was watching a Bob Ross painting come to life. You know Bob Ross, the guy with the big red afro and beard who would paint those landscape settings on PBS. Was there anything more relaxing than watching Bob Ross paint? You could be having the worst day, stressed out to the max and by simply watching him paint for five minutes you would feel so relaxed and at ease that you would swear you were just given a dose of Morphine. I'm actually kind of disappointed that Phil Mickelson won the Masters because there are very few things you can count on in the world of sports. Mickelson being the best golfer to never win a Major was one of those. I guess I'll just have to rely on other ones like: the Miami Dolphins annual December swoon, Brian Savage scoring the majority of his goals in October, Markus Naslund never breaking a smile, and the Corel Centre being a neutral site for a Leafs-Sens game.
|
Let me know what you thought about this commentary.